015 : Being Hospitable For New Moms
IN THIS WEEK’S EPISODE, CO-HOSTS MADDIE AND KAIT SHARE BOTH SPIRITUAL AND PERSONAL EXAMPLES OF WHAT TRUE, BIBLICAL HOSPITALITY LOOKS LIKE, AND HOW WE CAN SHOW HOSPITALITY WITHOUT GIVING TOO MUCH OF OURSELVES IN THE MEANTIME. MADDIE AND KAITLIN SHARE THAT THEY FEEL ESPECIALLY PASSIONATE ABOUT BEING HOSPITABLE TO NEW MOMs and serving them in such a vulnerable and exhausting time in their lives. this episode is full of jesus, wisdom on what maddie and kaitlin appreciated directly following having their babies, and ways you can better serve the new mamas in your own life!
kaitlin kicks off this week’s episode by sharing a little bit about herself and maddie’s feelings on being hospitable for new moms. kaitlin tells listeners that her and maddie both had so many hospitable people in their corners after having their babies, and that this outpouring of love from the people around them really taught both co-hosts a lot about the importance of being hospitable to new moms.
maddie shares that when she was praying about this episode and what the lord wanted it to look like, she felt a shift in her spirit and like god was showing her that for so long, we have had the idea of what hospitality is all wrong. we have this misconception that hospitality means we have to “do, do, do” but as maddie points out, this is not what hospitality looked like in the bible and is not how jesus showed hospitality to those around him.
hospitality can look like cooking a meal for someone or just making room for them in your life.
jesus invited sinners to eat with him and the poor to sit with him—and we are created to mirror jesus.,
sometimes the best way to be hospitable is to just listen and take in what other moms are thinking and feeling without comparing it to your own motherhood journey. kaitlin expresses that both she and maddie want to emphasize that making room for someone in your life often means just sitting back, listening, and not offering any advice or encouragement until you are asked to do so.
maddie shares that there are often days where she sees a friend having a bad day and wants to invite them over to just have coffee and hangout but she finds herself worried about herself more so than the friend: but i haven’t vacuumed, there is dog hair everywhere, i haven’t done the dishes all week, i haven’t showered in days, etc.
maddie: “instead of having a pinterest view of hospitality, we need to just have the same posture as jesus and invite connection and intimacy”
dang. read that again.
kaitlin follows this by saying that both she and maddie totally get the point of view that illustrates how we want to invite people over to a clean home, one that is prepared for guests and comfortable. yet jesus does not call us to be clean or comfortable, he calls us to reflect who he is and lead people back to him.
Romans 12:13: “share with the lord’s people who are in need, practice hospitality”
proverbs 11:25: “A generous person will prosper. whoever refreshes others will be refreshed”
if we continually put on a show in order to be “more hospitable,” then how can we expect people to genuinely connect with us? PROVERBS MAKES IT CLEAR THAT WE ARE TO BE GENEROUS AND REFRESHING TO OTHERS. IT DOES NOT SAY THAT WE HAVE TO DO THAT IN A CLEAN HOUSE, NICE CAR, OR WITH PERFECTLY MANICURED HANDS. IN ALL THINGS, WE ARE CALLED TO BRING GLORY TO GOD, AND THAT APPLIES TO BEING HOSPITABLE IN ALL AREAS OF OUR LIVES.
kaitlin transitions the conversation tOWARDS THE TOPIC OF being hospitable to new moms and how much she and maddie have learned about this through their own experiences.
kaitlin shares that before she had a baby, she had absolutely no clue how hard it is to walk through all aspects of motherhood.
MADDIE AND KAITLIN UNDERSTAND THAT NEW MOMS HAVE A LOOOOOT GOING ON as they tackle the first moments of motherhood. BECAUSE OF THIS, THE HOSTS EXPRESS THAT THEY want to share things that people did for them that they loved and appreciated during their postpartum journeys:
FRIENDS WHO BROUGHT MEALS OR OTHER THINGS AND DID NOT EXPECT TO SEE THE BABY, THEY JUST WANTED TO SHOW THEY WERE THERE.
KAITLIN’S MOM CAME AND HELPED WITH GENERAL HOUSE THINGS BECAUSE KAITLIN DOES NOT LIKE BEING HOME ALONE AND HER MOM KNEW THAT SHE NEEDED HELP IN SOME AREAS, BUT NOT IN THE ONES THAT INVOLVED MOTHERLY DUTIES.
MADDIE’S MOM CAME AND STAYED WITH THEM FOR A WEEK OR TWO AND HER JOB WAS NOT TO HELP WITH KEEGAN, IT WAS TO TAKE CARE OF MADDIE AND WALK THROUGH POSTPARTUM WITH HER.
A FRIEND SENT FLOWERS TO MADDIE FROM WHERE SHE WAS AND DID NOT EVEN SAY ANYTHING TO HER BEFORE BECAUSE SHE DID NOT WANT MADDIE TO FEEL OBLIGATED TO TALK TO HER IF SHE WAS NOT FEELING UP TO IT.
PEOPLE INTENTIALLY ASKING THE MAMAS HOW THEY WERE DOING INSTEAD OF JUST HOW THE BABY IS.
MADDIE AND KAITLIN THEN SHARE SOME WAYS THAT YOU CAN LOVE ON NEW MAMAS.
JUST BE. MAKE ROOM FOR CONVERSATION AND INTENTIONALITY FOR THE MAMAS IN YOUR LIFE. JUST SIT AND LISTEN AN DON’T TRY TOO HARD TO BE THERE FOR THEM.
WHATEVER THE MAMA NEEDS, MAKE ROOM FOR IT.
WILLINGLY SERVE WITHOUT HESITATION—KNOW YOUR FRIENDS AND THEIR LOVE LANGUAGES AND SERVE THEM IN THAT WAY.
INSTEAD OF ASKING IF YOU CAN GO AND SEE THE BABY, TRY SOMETHING LIKE “HEY! I JUST DROPPED COFFEE OFF ON YOUR FRONT PORCH, ENJOY!”
TRY TO MAKE THE MAMA FEEL SPECIAL AND LIKE SHE IS STILL IMPORTANT AFTER HER BABY WAS BORN.
RUN ERRANDS FOR THE NEW MOM. IT IS SO HARD TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE WITH A CHILD AND YOU CAN’T DRIVE FOR TWO WEEKS AFTER GIVING BIRTH.
BABYSIT THEIR OLDER CHILDREN—IT IS REALLY HARD FOR NEW MAMAS TO KEEP UP WITH THE NEW BABY, MUCH LESS THEIR OLDER CHILDREN AS WELL.
PUT TOGETHER A POSTPARTUM BATH KIT OR BASKET FOR THE MAMA TO TAKE CARE OF HERSELF AND SHOW THAT YOU CARE THAT THEY TAKE CARE OF THEMSELVES AFTER HAVING A BABY.