006 : Finding Beauty in Opposite Birth Stories

Let's get DEEP!!!! In this episode, we get super detailed on what each of our co-hosts birth stories looked like. We both recently became moms to some very cute baby boys and when we welcomed them into this world, our lives were forever changed. However, our births looked COMPLETELY different. in this episode We talk all about our experience in the hospital as first time moms, as well as give you two different perspectives on what having a baby looks like. We use our time to encourage you that whatever way you may or may not choose to welcome your child into the world, it can be so beautiful. We let you in on expectation versus reality and leave you with our best advice for walking in this season whether you are expecting a baby, already had one, or are dreaming of it one day happening. If you want to hear all about how we welcomed Keegan and Beckett into this world, this will be one of your favorite episodes!

tRIgGER WARNING: discussions of child birth

On today’s episode, maddie and kait let listeners in on each of their PREGNANICES AND BIRTH STORIES—which look very different from one another and provide different perspectives for listeners.

kait prefaces her pregnancy story by sharing with listeners that the two co-hosts are actually recording this episode back in December of 2021, to which she follows up by stating that at the same time in 2020 she was getting ready to tell her family that she was pregnant, and now she has a six month old.

kaitlin shares that when she was pregnant with her son, beckett, she was very, very sick in the beginning and surviving off of milk and ginger ale—even to the point that she was down for the count for about five weeks. Once she hit fourteen weeks pregnant she was expecting things to get better like everyone always says, but they didn’t and she spent her whole pregnancy being sICK.

Maddie shares that she was also sick at the beginning, though not as sick as kaitlin was. Maddie talks about how hard it was to keep it a secret because she was sick and trying to keep it hidden for a little while longer. maddie says she remembers being on the way to a wedding and stopping on the side of the road to throw up and just thinking “this is terrible.” TOWARDS THE END OF HER PREGNANY, MADDIE GOT TERRIBLE HEARTBURN AND CRAMPS IN HER BODY. MADDIE ALSO SHARES THAT RIGHT AFTER SHE HAD KEEGAN SHE WANTED TO BE PREGNANT AGAIN AND HAD TO REMIND HERSELF WHAT IT WAS LIKE.

KAITLIN CHIMES IN BY TALKING ABOUT HER THIRD TRIMESTER AND HOW IT WASN’T QUITE AS BAD AS MADDIE BECAUSE MADDIE IS REALLY SHORT, LIKE BARELY 5 FEET TALL, SO SHE HAD A LOT TO CARRY ON HER SMALL BODY.

Kaitlin shares that she feels like as soon as she had beckett something just clicked and she transitioned into being a mom really well and really quickly—which is something she feared would be hard for her.

after talking about their pregnancies, maddie and kait transition into the telling of each of their birth stories, with maddie up first.

Kaitlin shares that maddie has a “bomb birth story” that is spiritual and “ideal” when you imagine how your birth story will go.

maddie starts out by sharing that at 32 weeks she and kaitlin flew to maryland to shoot a wedding together. during the shoot, maddie started experiencing what she thought to be just braxton hicks contractions—false labor—but during the night, with her bestie kaitlin sound asleep beside her, maddie realized that she was experiencing actual contractions at only 32 weeks pregnant.

at 35 weeks pregnant, maddie shot another wedding on a saturday, had a baby shower on sunday, and monday she HIT 36 WEEKS AND went to her baby appointment, WHERE SHE JUST KNEW something was different. the nurse checked to see if she was dilated and sure enough she was 4cm dilated already and the nurse told she and her husband that they needed to go to the hospital because she was going to be having the baby really soon.

maddie shares that as soon as the nurse left the room she burst into tears and when her husband checked on her she just kept telling him she wasn’t okay and things weren’t how she wanted them to be.

on the way to the hospital, shaun told maddie she had from their house to the hospital to figure out who was going to cover the wedding she was supposed to shoot that weekend, and then she needed to put her phone down and enjoy the birth of their baby (IN THE MOST LOVING, CONCERED-HUSBAND KIND OF WAY.

with that motivation, maddie franticly texted kaitlin and asked her to compose an email for maddie to send to her client explaining that she was going into labor four weeks early and someone else would be covering the wedding—while also assuring the bride that the photos of her day would still be perfect! kaitlin being the bestie she is helped maddie to take care of what she needed to for her business and before she knew it she was at the hospital, in shock, and ready to give birth to her baby.

to start things off, doctors gave maddie a shot for keegan in order to help develop his lungs since he was going to be four weeks early. after this, maddie is told that they really don’t want her to give birth to the baby for forty-eight hours so that they can give her another dose twenty-four hours from the time she took the first one. after the first shot, the nurses checked how dilated she was and they told her they couldn’t wait and they needed to break her water.

after her epidural, and many hours of labor, maddie pushed for about twenty minutes before giving birth to her precious little boy, keegan.

maddie shares that her birth story was truly everything she could have wanted, down to the memorable worship song that was playing in the background as they welcomed keegan into the world.

KEEGAN CLAYTON TURNER

BORN MAY 25TH, 2021 AT 8:54PM

WEIGHING 6 POUNDS AND 9 OUNCES

WITH A HEIGHT OF 18 3/4 INCHES.

moving on, maddie moves the conversation over to kaitlin and asks her to tell her very different birth story..

kaitlin prefaces by saying that when maddie told her about her birth story, kaitlin already knew that her own birth story would be drastically different because that is just how things work, right?

moving into her story, kaitlin tells listeners that when she and her husband, hunter, went into their 36 week appointment, the same point maddie was at when she went into labor, their visit went a little different. kAITLIN EXPLAINS THAT THE 36 WEEK APPOINTMENT IS WHEN DOCTORS CHECK TO SEE IF THE BABY IS HEAD DOWN OR NOT, WHICH IS SOMETHING THAT KAITLIN WAS PREPARED FOR BEFORE. when THE DOCTOR BEGAN THE ULTRASOUND, SHE IMMEDIATELY SAID “OH, HIS HEAD IS NOT AT THE BOTTOM” VERY CASUALLY, WITH NO REMORSE FOR THE MAMA WHO DOESN’T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

KAITLIN THEN HAD TO DO A “BIG ULTRASOUND” IN ORDER FOR THE DOCTOR TO BE ABLE TO TELL WHETHER OR NOT THERE WAS A POSSIBILITY OF FLIPPING HIM. THE DOCTOR CONCLUDED THAT THERE COULD BE ENOUGH FLUID FOR THEM TO FLIP HIM, BUT THAT THERE WAS A POSSIBILITY THAT HE COULD FLIP ON HIS OWN AND IT WAS UP TO HUNTER AND KAITLIN TO DECIDE WHAT THEY WANTED TO DO.

ULTIMATELY, HUNTER AND KAITLIN DECIDED NOT TO DO THE PROCEDURE TO TRY AND FLIP HIM AND ENDED UP SCHEDULING A C-SECTION FOR WHEN KAITLIN HIT 39 WEEKS.

WHEN THE DAY FOR THE C-SECTION CAME, KAITLIN COMPARES GETTING THERE FOR HER C-SECTION TO CHECKING INTO A HOTEL. AFTER GETTING CHECKED IN, SHE GOT SETTLED IN A HOSPITAL ROOM AND STARTED DOING ALL OF THE THINGS A WOMAN HAS TO DO BEFORE GIVING BIRTH.

WHEN THE TIME CAME, KAITLIN WAS ROLLED BACK TO THE ROOM WHERE SHE WAS CONTINUALLY TOLD TO RELAX HER SHOULDERS AND BODY AND SHE WAS ADMINISTERED A SPINAL BLOCK—WHICH IMMEDITALY KICKED IN AND NUMBED THE BOTTOM HALF OF HER BODY. AFTER THIS, KAITLIN SAYS THEY MOVED HER UP ON THE BED AND STARTED THE PROCEDURE, WHICH IS WHEN HUNTER WAS FINALLY ALLOWED BACK IN THE ROOM.

kaitlin: “When they told me i wouldn’t be able to feel my body or feel anything i was like its going to be like i was invisible, like it’s not there. no, that’s not how it felt. it felt like my body was this weighted, paralyzed thing and that is when I really started to. freak out. like, i was panicking.”

about 10-15 minutes later hunter was in kaitlin’s ear asking how it was and how she was and before she knew it, beckett was there and she was able to see him being born through a curtain that was pulled back for her.

but, beckett was immediately taken away and kaitlin was sewn up while hunter watched his son’s first moments for he and his wife. soon after, kaitlin was able to see, hold, and kiss the baby she had just given birth to in an almost traumatic way.

kaitlin shares that she had a peace going into the hospital that it was okay that she was having a baby through a C-section and that peace made for a really beautiful experience in the end.

BECKETT PAUL HAINES

BORN AUGUST 2ND, 2021 AT 1:27 PM

WEIGHING 7 POUNDS AND 3 OUNCES

WITH A HEIGHT OF 20 INCHES.

FOLLOWING HER BIRTH STORY, MADDIE ASKS KAIT IF SHE HAD ANY EXPECTATIONS FOR WHAT HER DELIVERY WOULD BE LIKE AND KAITLIN SHARES THAT SHE EXPECTED THE SPINAL TAP TO HURT AND, LIKE SHE SHARED BEFORE, SHE EXPECTED NOT TO FEEL HER BODY AFTER AS WELL. KAITLIN ALSO SHARES THAT SHE ALSO WANTED THE EXPERIENCE TO BE MORE SPIRITUAL THAN IT WAS, SHE STILL WANTED WORSHIP MUSIC PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND EVEN IF IT WASN’T A NATURAL BIRTH, AND THAT JUST DIDN’T HAPPEN.

MADDIE SHARES THAT SHE HAD EXPECTATIONS BUT SHE HAD ALSO PHOTOGRAPHED BIRTHS IN THE PAST AND WAS A PART OF BOTH OF HER SISTERS BEING BORN AND UNDERSTOOD THAT BIRTH IS A CONSTANT SURRENDER AND IT IS NOT SOMETHING SHE HAD ANY CONTROL OVER. GOING INTO LABOR FOUR WEEKS EARLY WAS NEVER PART OF HER PLAN BUT SHE KNEW SHE JUST HAD TO ACCEPT THAT IT WAS GOD’S PLAN AND KEEGAN WAS COMING EITHER WAY.

MADDIE EXPLAINS THAT SHE DID WANT WORSHIP MUSIC PLAYING, SHAUN TO CUT THE CORD, TO NURSE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, AND A FEW OTHER THINGS BUT ONCE LABOR STARTED HER BOYD JUST TOOK OVER AND KNEW WHAT TO DO.

MADDIE TELLS LISTENERS THAT SHE FEELS LIKE THE HARDEST PART OF LABOR AND DELIVERY IS THE VERY END. GIVING BIRTH IS REALLY HARD ON A WOMAN’S MENTAL GAME AND IT IS ESPECIALLY HARD IN THOSE END MOMENTS.

MADDIE: “aND IT IS ONE OF THOSE THINGS WHERE YOU JUST HAVE TO LOCK EYES WITH JESUS AND BE LIKE OK. YOU GOT ME. MY BODY WAS INTENDED FOR THIS AND I CAN DO IT.”

MADDIE SAYS THAT SHE REMEMBERS THE DOCTOR TELLING HER TO REACH DOWN AND FEEL HIS HEAD AND IN THE MOMENT SHE WAS DETERMINED TO GET HIM OUT. TWO MORE PUSHES AND KEEGAN WAS EARTH SIDE. THE LORD ALWAYS PROVIDES PERSERVERENCE AND STRENGTH EVEN IN THE HARDEST OF MOMENTS.

KAITLIN AND MADDIE TALK ABOUT HOW PEOPLE ALWAYS SAY THAT AFTER LABOR AND DELIVERY YOU FORGET THE PAINFUL PART OF THE EXPERIENCE, WHICH MADDIE SAYS SHE DID. AFTER HAVING KEEGAN, MADDIE SAYS SHE FELT LIKE SHE COULD HAVE 100 MORE. KAITLIN, ON THE OTEHR HAND, HAD A TOTALLY DIFFERNT EXPERIENCE AFTER AND FELT NOTHING BUT PAIN FOR SOME TIME AFTER.

KAITLIN SHARES THAT SHE ENDED UP NOT BREAST FEEDING BECAUSE IT JUST DID NOT WORK FOR THEM AND SHE WAS VERY INSECURE THAT PEOPLE WOULD JUDGE HER IF SHE DIDN’T BREAST FEED. IN THE END, KAITLIN IS OKAY WITH NOT BREAST FEEDING AND STATES THAT ‘FED IS BEST’ AND IT DOES NOT MATTER HOW BABIES GET FED, IT JUST MATTERS THAT THEY DO.

BOTH OF OUR CO-HOSTS SHARE THAT THERE ARE SO MANY EXPECTATIONS FOR BIRTH, WHICH SOCIAL MEDIA DOES NOT HELP, BUT WHATEVER WAY YOU GIVE BIRTH IT IS HARD AND PAINFUL BUT THE LORD TEACHES US SO MUCH DURING THOSE MOMENTS, WE JUST HAVE TO BE WILLING TO LISTEN TO HIM.

MADDIE AND KAIT END THE PODCAST BY ENCOURGING MAMAS, SOON-TO-BE MAMAS, WANNA BE MAMAS, WHOEVER, THAT THERE IS NO SUCH THINGS AS A PERFECT BIRTH STORY AND WHATEVER WAY YOU GAVE BIRTH, OR ARE GOING TO SOME DAY, THE LORD WILL USE YOU FOR A PURPOSE.

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Thank you SO much for being here. We hope you leave today feeling more encouraged than you were when you started listening and like you are a welcome part of this community— because you ARE.

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Music : Better Than Life by Oliver Dodge