When Peace Surpasses Your Understanding

Author: Kaitlin Haines

Often, we find ourselves in the midst of painful circumstances that seem to lord over us and cast a shadow that blocks the light. We suddenly feel a heavy weight that is bearing down on us and feel a lack of strength to push it off. We begin to allow that weight—that shadow—to distance us from the one that we are supposed to run to. This is where I have found myself recently.

In the midst of these circumstances, you’re trying to pray. You’re trying to hope. You’re trying to surrender. You’re trying to have faith. But the weight doesn’t give. And whether your weight is physical pain, a waiting season, feeling like your world is caving in, financial struggle, loneliness, depression, anxiety, loss of control, etc., you feel like instead of it getting lighter, it just keeps getting heavier…and heavier…and heavier…and…

“Where are you, Lord?”

I’ve been asking Him this. While I am sitting in the midst of what I know to be obedience, I’m asking where He went. I am asking Him when the reward is going to come. I am asking Him when the weight is going to be lifted. But it doesn’t budge. I feel so alone in this. So, where do I turn?

“That is so valid.”

Those are the words I have been craving to hear lately. I find myself drowning in the midst of pain and looking for someone to understand. I spend my days aching for someone to fill the hole in my heart with validation that my feelings are truth and that my venting is worth it. Truly, I just want someone to feel what I feel. I want someone to see me. I want someone to be in this with me, rather than feeling isolated in my pain. When I am unsure where the Lord is, I look to my friends—the ones who know me best and validate me the way I can always count on.

Don’t get me wrong, community is SO important and validation of feelings can be a helpful way of working through difficult times. I thank God that I have friends that are willing to encourage me in these seasons and validate the human feelings that I have from a biblical perspective. But…how many times do I need to be validated before I realize I am searching for the wrong thing—finding my strength (or weakness) in worldly perception? Because often, that is what validation is. Looking for validation outside of the Lord himself is searching for the world to rationalize my flesh-driven reaction to my circumstances.

Earlier today, I heard the Lord speak these words:

“You don’t need validation. You need peace that surpasses your understanding.”

Oh. Okay, Lord…Ouch.

Honestly, it was a punch to the gut. I realized instantly how desperate I was for human validation. I realized that my feelings were controlling me, and I had completely lost faith and trust in the one who sustains me through this life. I realized that I lacked patience and was giving into the chaos around me. I realized that I was operating in my sinful nature to give into selfish desires and prideful control.

Here’s the truth: It is hard for me to admit that I let myself be subject to the enemy’s tactic to bring me down from my faith and trust in Jesus, but that is exactly what I did.

The last couple of weeks in my life have been mentally, physically, and spiritually draining. I feel like I am failing constantly, and that everything I am doing has gone unnoticed. But something else that has occurred to me is that in the last couple of weeks, I have been serving myself, taking control, and lacking in my time sitting at Jesus’ feet letting His Word fill me up. And that, my friend, is what got me here in the first place.

Validation will never satisfy.

Today, the Lord pointed me to Philippians 4:6-7. It says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

In my particular situation, I have let worry, control, and wondering take over me. Rather than having faith in the one who led me to where I am, I am questioning Him, frustrated with impatience and pride. This is a hard thing to admit, but it’s truth. I am not perfect — in fact — I’m the most imperfect person I know. I get so incredibly frustrated with myself when I realize how broken I am when I give into my flesh, rather than holding fast to God’s steadfast love and immense goodness.

I don’t need to seek validation from friends. I don’t need to take control and figure things out on my own. I don’t need to worry about what my future holds. I don’t need to focus on how I am failing and spiral into feeling worthless and purposeless.

What I need is Peace.

The peace that surpasses all understanding is one that shuts down the lies of the enemy. It is one that allows for releasing control that we can’t seem to otherwise. It is a peace that requires no knowledge of what the future holds, but a calm joy that knows that the Lord goes before me and “there” is already taken care of.

Matthew 6:28 says, “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith?”

This is one of my favorite verses, and one that I continuously come back to in hardship, especially when it comes to the Lord’s provision. It is a peace that only the Lord can give knowing the Lord will take care of us just as he does the flowers, the birds, and all that He created.

We matter to Him. Therefore, He will take care of us.

We must surrender the circumstances to Him, and trust that He WILL take care of us. Psalm 55:22 says, “Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the Godly to slip and fall.” In another translation He says he will sustain us. While it may feel easier to pray for the Lord to take away our circumstances, we know that He has made it clear that there is suffering to endure when you’re living life for Christ. But in that suffering, he sustains—strengthens—us. The promise was never that the Lord would take the burden and carry it. The promise is that he will sustain us through it. He is our ever present help in time of need (Psalm 46).

Abundant Peace

With surrender, we must come to Him in a posture of gratitude as Philippians 4 says, so that we will receive the peace that surpasses all understanding. Through our surrendering of hardship, there is a freedom that comes with knowing that we can’t do it on our own. And that freedom is an abundant peace that surpasses or exceeds what our human brains can fathom. And praise God that His wisdom is so much greater than our own.

So, friend. I hope that if you’re reading this and you’re walking through hardship, you recognize that there is freedom in giving it all over to Him. That our suffering is purposeful in the Kingdom of God. And that if we can give our worries, cares, control, situations, etc. over to Him, He will sustain us through it and allow His glory to shine through. There is purpose in your pain and there is healing in His name. He is always faithful. And He is our peace.